Cause all I want is you
by Gemmaaaaa
Summary: The only way to save the Galaxy from this terrible sickness, to save her sister and Darred, was to face the one man Padme had never believed she'd ever see again. For, the mysterious and cruel Vader was someone she'd once known so very well. Someone she'd always believed so much in. Someone, she'd even come close to marrying once.
1. Desperate

The black sickness infects too many too fast for anyone, even the most celebrated doctors, med droids and even emdee droids to keep up with. Its sickly black touch seems to have developed overnight, non-existent one day, unstoppable the very next. The disease began as a trickle, with merely one or two reported cases far out in the Outer-rim-territories where the Senate could ignore its existence, but it did not stay that way for very long. Ten cases became one hundred, one hundred cases became ten thousand cases and after that… Entire _systems_ fell prey to the sickness all at once. Padme had never seen something so fast acting, so _deadly_ consume so many before. Not even the Republic's clones were safe. It was worse than Naboo's Blue Shadow Virus, and when the new epidemic found its way into the inner core and struck her beloved home world, it took so many more lives than the virus she'd worked so hard to keep contained ever could have.

Her people died by the thousands and there was _nothing_ she could do. It broke her heart and infuriated the Senator all at once. She was fortunate… For a while, Padme considered herself _lucky_ because her family were safe. Locked away in the Lake Country, the disease hadn't slithered into their bodies as it had so many others. But as all things do, Padme's luck eventually just _ran out._ It was Sola who contracted the sickness first, and then Darred and mercifully her parents were able to remove Padme's little nieces from the home before their little lives, too, were endangered. But her beloved sister and brother and law were whisked away to the best available medcenter on Naboo at the Senator's expense where she could not visit or bring them home comforts to ease their suffering.

With the possibility of death drawing nearer and nearer for two of the few people Padme loved endlessly, she grew desperate, funnelling credits by the thousands into research into the sickness. She used both public funded establishments and private. But not even Alderaan's physicians could find _anything_ to stop the spread. Hopelessly grew across the Galaxy and not the Chancellor, the Senate or even the Jedi could do anything to make it better.

But then, it happened. Someone came forward with the much longed for cure. Someone who'd engineered one all by themselves here, on Coruscant without the help of _any_ medical professional and all across the Galaxy, hope was reignited in so many beings. That was, until the mysterious being who'd found a way to save them all, to save Padme's family, took that hope and stamped it into the dirt beneath their boot. Their cure worked, they knew it because this person, this _man_ who went by the name of _Vader_ , had proven it. But he would not share it with those who needed it so desperately. Not for nothing. He gave out little of it to those who he believed had _earned_ it. Whether through monetary bribes, favours, gifts and whatever else, the cure had a _price._ And Vader was smart about his despicableness . He gave out just enough for a single dosage per being… Not nearly enough to allow the cure to be shared or recreated and it sickened Padme to her very core.

So she took her donations from the research facilities and instead hired as many bounty hunters as she could afford to unmask this Vader. People _needed_ the cure and by the Force, Padme Amidala was going to get it to them. Whatever the cost.

Still, nothing in the Galaxy could have ever prepared the Senator for the answer she received. At last, after almost a month of waiting, of praying to the Force, to all of the Goddesses or Naboo and any other deity available for Sola and Darred's health, one of the Bounty Hunters completed their mission. Aurra Sing returned to Padme with a name before any other could. And she made sure to pay the woman handsomely for her silence upon the reveal. Because, although the information was much sought after by _everyone_ , both Republic and Separatist, there was one being who stood a chance of convincing Vader to release the cure. The Senate had _tried._ They ordered Vader to give the cure to licenced professionals or else be arrested as a traitor. But he'd merely moved his research facilities to the Outer-Rim, where this all began. Where the Senate couldn't touch him.

There was only one person who Vader might listen to, because upon reading the name given to her by the bounty hunter, after Padme had given the woman her credits and seen her out, she wept into her pillow for hours.

The only way to save the Galaxy from this terrible sickness, to save her sister and Darred, was to face the one man Padme had never believed she'd ever see again. For, the mysterious and cruel Vader was someone she'd once known so very well. Someone she'd always believed so much in. Someone, she'd even come close to marrying once.

Vader was Anakin Skywalker.

So long ago, when there'd been attempts upon her life, Anakin Skywalker had been her Jedi protector. They'd hidden away together in the summer heat of Naboo, and against all odds, fall in love with each other. In the short frame of time they were thrown together, they fought through so much more than most couples experience in a lifetime… The death of Anakin's mother, the drama of forbidden romance, almost losing their lives in Geonosis in the execution arena and a battle against a Sith which sparked the beginning of the Clone Wars. But none of that meant they could stay together, or that they could _be_ together. And though it had broken Padme's heart and his own just as much, when Anakin asked her to marry him after escorting her home, she'd refused him.

There'd been shouting, and begging and so many tears from them both. And eventually, Anakin accepted her answer and left her, head hung low and shoulders slumped in defeat and to see the man she loved so utterly hurt by her had hurt worse than the Nexu's claws tearing the flesh off of her back.

She'd never seen Anakin again. He'd appeared in many news holos over the course of the Clone Wars, until he didn't. Until there were rumours that the Jedi's Chosen One was fallen, that he'd turned to the Dark Side. Others whispered that he was dead. Padme hadn't been sure which was worse. Obi-wan confessed that he didn't know which was true… That he'd woken one day to find his former apprentice's lightsaber left behind and the boy he'd raised to adulthood gone without a word. No one had heard from him since.

Padme had always hoped that he was happy, wherever he was. Never believing the rumours of his turn to the dark side, one selfish part of her had always hoped that maybe, just maybe, now without the ties to the Jedi, he might come to her and ask her that life changing question again… But he never had. And she knew she was a fool for wishing so. There could very well be another woman who'd given him the comfort Padme could not throughout the war… Someone else could have held his heart instead and he had every right to give it. But still, his disappearance _hurt._

And now, now her prestigious chrome star sciff looked terribly out of place in the darkness of Mustafar as it landed gracefully upon the landing pad. Every inch of the Senator trembled as her eyes took in the dark, looming towers of the black stone castle built into the rocks of the lava planet that looked nothing like the home of a former Jedi… It seemed like something built for a Sith. And the very thought only made her tremble harder. This was the home Anakin – or _Vader_ – had built himself after the commands of the Senate… It looked wrong. Like something from one of her favourite holovids as a child, an evil castle for an evil villain…

Was that what he had become?

Tears sprung into Padme's eyes suddenly and she leant her forehead against her palm for a moment as the grief threatened to consume her whole. All around the ship, lava crashed against the rocky shores like waves and already the transparisteel of her ship's windows was beginning to fog in the heat. She dreaded leaving her ship, and one small part of her wanted to simply restart the engines and return home. But she couldn't. So many lives depended on her now. It was her duty.

Inside the castle, there seemed to be no life, no warmth despite the heat, and no beings of any race to fill the many rooms… It was silent. Save for the droids who walked from room to room fulfilling whatever jobs they'd been created for, there was nothing. Padme stepped further inside, her tan leggings sticking to her skin in the heat and suddenly regretted her choice in wearing boots. Despite the way things had ended between them, despite why she was here, and despite her fears, Padme's lips curled up into a small, wistful smile… Because no matter how he may have changed, it was just like her Ani to surround himself with _droids_ of all things. At least some things remained the same about him. It meant she had a chance.

Eventually, she's met by familiar droid, one she'd gotten to know so well in their shamefully short time together, though now, he looked rather different. No more loose wires or exposed sockets. Anak – _Vader_ treated his old friend to the very best golden plating available. Unspursing, given his history with the droid, but part of Padme still cringed at the expense… Just how much wealth had he amassed by playing God over the life and death of so many beings?

"Threepio!" She forced herself to smile because it was not the fault of the droid that this had happened. And, truthfully, Padme had missed his fussy personality. "You look different."

"Ah, yes." His arms rose proudly as if to further show off the plating. "Isn't it wonderful? Master Ani bought it just for me! I've been _very_ useful lately." And at that, Padme couldn't _not_ laugh, even a little. Suddenly, she wished she hadn't commanded Artoo to stay with the ship… Those two had always gotten along wonderfully. Perhaps, if all went well, there would be more time, another chance…

A very large if.

Threepio announced that his Master was waiting for her, and Padme followed the droid through the castle silently. It was dull… No possessions or decorations filled the vast hallway they walked through. Dark curtains blocked out what little light Mustafar had leaving only small lamps to provide the much-needed illumination. There was nothing of Anakin here… Nothing that told of his personality or humour. Nothing to show that someone of flesh and blood lived here. It was all rather… Saddening. She'd wanted him to be _happy_ in what he did, but this was not a home that seemed anything more than miserable and isolated.

"Threepio, does anyone else stay here?" Padme had to know. Did he live here alone? Were there others who lived with him? Worked with him, even? Just a few steps ahead of her, Threepio gave a small sound of surprise, as if such a question was one he hadn't been expecting.

"Oh no. Master Ani is very specific about who comes here. Any visitors do not stay for long." The droid gave a forlorn sound, almost a sigh, and Padme felt for the poor thing. Threepio was so sociable. He would do well in a place more… Domesticated. But then, once she may have thought the same about Vader. However, the droid's words caught her attention. Vader saw his visitors here? There were always rumours about the placement of his facility, people were willing to spend their life savings to know where they could plead for the cure, but no one ever seemed to know just where to find him… Not even those who had been so lucky to be given the cure ever spoke up.

 _What did he do here?_

It has been three years since Padme Amidala last saw Anakin Skywalker, and when Threepio takes her inside a large chamber full of scattered equipment, parts and strangely coloured liquids she'd rather not look at for too long, she finds he's nothing like she remembers. He's _bigger_ than she remembered. Once lean but strong with wiry muscles lining his body, he was now thick with muscle from his efforts on the war front. And his hair… What was once bright blonde and cropped short to meet with the Jedi rules for human hair for their Padawans, was now long honey-blonde curls that reached the end of his neck… No longer was he a boy on the cusp of manhood. He _was_ a man now. And the man watched her enter with blue eyes as cold as ice.

Padme wondered if he was anything like the boy she'd fallen in love with at all.

She found him sitting by a large fire – why he needed one in the heat of Mustafar, she didn't understand – on an expensive wingback chair, the first furniture she'd seen since arriving and swallowed down her nervousness. _This was it._ There was no turning back now. An old habit sprung back to life suddenly, and she itched to make use of her fingers by playing with her hair… But by some mercy, Dorme had braided it this morning, so her long locks were beyond her reach. To deal with his, there could be no distractions. _She needed this cure._

Honestly, part of Padme was surprised that he'd gone as far as to build himself this grand palace atop the corpses of those he'd let die, and hadn't carved himself out a throne to perch himself upon.

He always had a flair for the dramatics after all.

"Anakin," She begins, with the hope that his name, his _true_ name from her lips may soften him to her appeal. It does not work.

"That name no longer has any meaning for me!" He snapped and Padme stumbled backwards slightly, from the surprise of it.

" _Please…_ Many people need your help." Padme pleads, eyes wide and desperate. "Countless beings are dying all across the Galaxy and no one else knows how to end the senseless loss and suffering… They need you to help them." She pauses to gather herself against the burning tears that blurred her vision as she imagines her poor nieces missing their parents. " _I_ need you."

Once upon a time, he told her she was in his very soul… And now Padme wasn't sure he still had one. But if there was a chance it was still there, that there was a _shred_ of the man she loved left… She had to appeal to that side of him, to the man who'd believed that compassion was the truest form of love. _He_ wanted to help people. Not leave them to suffer. The man who looked at her now… Were they even the same person?

In his silence, it's Vader's eyes that frighten Padme more than anything. She remembered them as warm, and kind and loving despite the hardships life had dealt him from such a tender age… But now… Now they were colder, duller. No sign of the _life_ they'd once shone with. He looks older despite only being twenty-three years old, and whether that was due to this dangerous greed that had settled onto him, or fighting in a war, Padme couldn't know.

The quiet stretches on and on until finally, her desperation gets the better of her. " _Please, Ani._ My sister is sick… So is her husband. They can't die… They _can't."_ Two unwanted tears slip from her eye and along her cheeks and it's almost impossible to stop others from following their wet trails. She was so afraid he was going to say no, that her decision to break both their hearts and place duty above love would drive him to send her away empty-handed. Padme wasn't sure she could survive such a disappointment.

At last, it is Vader – or Anakin, Padme can't be sure which – who breaks the silence between them. "Sit down, Padme." It is not a question, and yet, it isn't a command either. There is neither warmth nor anger in his voice, so it was impossible to guess his feelings toward her plea. Regardless, she does as he says and sinks stiffly into the matching chair opposite his. At once, he rose and stepped past her and Padme watched the sensual dance of the flames as from behind her, she heard a _clinking._ Another tear fell from her eyes, but she was able to rid her skin of the evidence before he returned, settling down once more with an outstretched arm. With a jolt, she realised he was offering her a drink.

Blossomwine.

Her favourite.

Padme took it gladly and gave herself a generous sip. If it were _anyone_ else in the Galaxy, she'd be wearier… But no matter what had happened, he would never hurt her. She trusted in that. The sweet taste slipped down her throat without the usual burn of that most alcohol created and for that, she was glad. Something told her she'd need the numbing for what was to come.

Finally, he spoke again. "I'll give you the cure."

The glass almost fell from her hand with the shock. He – he would share it with her? For one blissful moment, sheer _relief_ fell upon Padme so heavily that laughter bubbled its way up, into her throat and almost escaped her mouth. _Almost._ Sola and Darred were going to be alright! She wasn't going to lose them! Oh, she wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry! Maybe what they said about him was wrong? Maybe the Anakin Padme had loved _was_ still in there?

"But, there's something I want in return."

At once, Padme's every hope deflated so rapidly that her body sagged slightly. _Oh._ Well, she should have known that would come… No one received the cure from Vader for nothing. There was always a price and not even Padme, his _angel_ , could be exempt. There was a fairness to it, she supposed.

"I'll give you as many credits as you want." She sighed, and sipped at her wine again, avoiding his eye. But then it happened, so unexpected that her gaze snapped up so quickly that she found him smirking into his own glass.

He _laughed._

"I don't want your money, angel." Was it terribly wrong that, despite it all, Padme's heart leapt in her chest at the sound of the special nickname he'd gifted her with over a decade ago? She hadn't heard it in so long and it just… No, it _was_ wrong. What relationship that existed between them was over. This was strictly business. An exchange of sorts, the cure for whatever he desired of her. Something about that sent a shudder of anticipation along the Senator's spine. That was the question, wasn't it? What _did_ he want?

"Then what?" Padme whispered.

"Marry me."


	2. Questions

_**A/N: Thank you so much for the fantastic response to the first chapter! I'm amazed. All of your wonderful reviews touched my heart. I hope you'll all enjoy what's to come just as much.**_

"Wa- _What?"_ Padme stuttered. Of _all_ of the possibilities she might have imagined, this was something she could never have… She would never have thought he would even _want_ to… "No!" She cried without thought and all but threw herself out of the chair. The glass fell from the Senator's trembling fingers and onto the hot stone floor with a loud _crash,_ fragments of glass shattering into a thousand tiny shards by her boots as what remained of her blossomwine splashed against the rich brown was he _thinking_?! Why would she _ever_ marry him after all he'd done? Everyone he'd let suffer so needlessly in the name of – of _what?_ If he were not her only hope of saving those she loved, Padme would have marched straight back to her ship this very instant and cursed the day Anakin Skywalker ever came into her life. How could he be so selfish? So _callous_?

This was _not_ the man she remembered at all. While always spontaneous, this was manipulative and just _vile_! What he proposed wasn't a _marriage_ ; it was a trade of ownership. Her life for her sister and brother in law's. He wanted her not for love, for this couldn't _possibly_ be love, but for possession, for filling that hole Padme created in his heart with her rejection all those years ago. It was the behaviour of someone who cared _nothing_ for her wellbeing. And Anakin wasn't like that… He _cared_ about her feelings and went out of his way to ensure her comfort… The Anakin she remembered would _never_ force her into anything – especially _marriage_.

Was this Vader?

Horrified, Padme turned away, unable to stomach so much as _looking_ at him at the moment as tears welled into her eyes and acidic bile burned at her throat. Behind her, she heard Vader rise from his own chair, and follow her in the few short steps she'd taken from him. Suddenly, the shock of the demand, or request or blackmail perhaps, faded as her quick mind worked to adjust to all that'd happened since her arrival in this terrible place, and all those feelings gave way to sheer _outrage_. Ire set ablaze, Padme whirled around, fire in her brown eyes. "How _dare you_?" She yelled and jabbed a finger into his chest. "Who do you think you are?!"

Once she had started, the indignant anger at his cruel offer only grew, Padme yelled and shrieked at him until her throat clawed for water and yet somehow she still found the will to continue. "How could you? It's wrong – it's unjustifiable! Did you truly think for _one moment_ that I could ever agree to this? I just don't understand – how you could… My _sister_ and Darred are _dying_ and you expect me to _marry_ you?" It continued and continued and then, the tears dried on her cheeks and she could muster no more words to hurl toward this man, the _imposter_ who wore Anakin's face. Strangely, unlike their previous conversation concerning marriage, the rejection seemed to simply bounce off of him as if it were nothing. There was no hurt in his eyes, no tears nor even a quivering lip… Nothing. He was expressionless. Vader looked as if she'd merely refused to share another drink with him, not a _life._ Where were his emotions? Throughout her entire tirade, he'd simply stood still, silently, neither reacting nor responding but just watching her with those icy blue eyes that had once held so much… So much _more._ He _was_ colder now. Harder.

She didn't know him anymore.

Only when she was calmer when her chest stopped it's heaving and her breath settled to something near calmness that he reached up to gently brush her cheek with the hard, calloused pad of his thumb and Padme couldn't hold back her flinch. What was this? It was wrong, so wrong… And yet, the way he looked at her now awoke long suppressed memories of the intense blue gaze in the middle of a lush green meadow three years ago. It was just the same and yet so different. Something about it, no matter the situation, no matter the horrendousness of what he'd done… Something about it made Padme's traitorous heart leap in her chest.

"I can't… I won't do it." She whispered because it was the truth. There had to be another way. Padme would give _anything_ to save her family and he knew that. She only prayed he would not take advantage of such intimate knowledge.

Vader's hand fell away from her cheek, and Padme forced herself to hold his gaze. She was a Senator of the Republic Senate, after years of reigning over Naboo and guiding them as Senator, she'd faced more than her fair share of hard gazes. She didn't wilt. Not even when she wanted to. Finally, he gave one stiff, reluctant nod of his head. "Fine. Then stay. For one month, here, with me." He whispered and although it was far from ideal, far from what she _wanted_ or even believed to be right, there was part of her, not the Senator, or the sister or daughter, or once Queen, but the _woman_ who despite it all, _wanted_ to. And, perhaps what was the most frightening, was that this strange desire to fulfil this request was not centred solely around Sola and Darred's health.

Perhaps it was a mistake; perhaps she would regret it one day…

But she stayed.

After all, what harm could one month here possibly do to her?

* * *

Padme may have opted to remain in Vader's castle, but that did not mean she was foolish enough to sleep in the same chamber. She meant what she said, this was strictly business. And to his credit, it seemed after the proposal, he seemed to agree. There was no mention of sharing a bed, and for that, Padme was endlessly relieved. Instead, she was shown to a large, if not slightly _dull_ chamber whose only _homely_ feature was the large bed situated near the wide transparisteel window overlooking the lava river which flowed beneath Vader's castle. It was far from the beautiful views the Senator had grown accustomed to in her life as a high ranking official on Coruscant and Naboo, but it was preferable to a dungeon which, truthfully, she'd been half-afraid would await her.

But, he surprised her again, because the next morning, after she was woken by Threepio serving breakfast in her bedroom, she found him in the same room as he had the previous night. The moment the heavy doors depressurised open, Vader glanced at her from over his shoulder and reached deep, inside the dark cloak which concealed his body and produced a large brown package. "Give this to Artoo and send him home in your ship."

Curious, Padme approached him slowly, each step more apprehensive than the last. When she drew close enough, Vader held out the strange package further and trembling fingers reached out to take it from him. His cold gaze swept over her as she carefully pried open the flap and widened the slit to peer into the darkness within and the sight that awaited her drew a shocked gasp from deep within her throat. Six long and thin vials lay inside, carefully placed so as to avoid the glass clashing and cracking, she supposed. A strange yellow liquid filled each one to the brim, where they'd been corked and Padme couldn't tear her eyes from them.

"Is this it?" She whispered though she already knew the answer. "The – the cure?" These little tubes contained something so beyond precious, something the Galaxy needed so desperately to purge its suffering citizens of the terrible sickness whose only aim was to kill. And she held it now, in her own hands… It felt… It felt _wrong_. To hold something which could save the lives of countless beings and not be able to use it to help everyone who's lives depended upon it made Padme wish to weep. But, she decided then and there, in that very moment, that something _good_ would come of this month spent in Vader's lonely tower… If there was even a trace of Anakin Skywalker within him, any of the _good_ he'd once given freely to the Galaxy, then Padme was going to find it. She was going to find it and make him see that he had to share this creation with the Galaxy.

She was going to make him save them all.

"Yes." His confirmation stole the breath from her lungs. "They only have to drink one vial each and within the day, the symptoms will begin easing. By the end of the week, their energy will begin to return to them." Vader stepped closer to her, and Padme's gaze snapped upward to meet his eyes. "They'll feel better than they ever have."

"Thank you…" She breathed, "Thank you so much…" Tears of true and utter _relief_ sprung to her eyes and Padme felt her legs quake with it too. It was really true, they were going to be alright. She wanted to run to her ship and nurse them both back to health herself, but she couldn't. Other's would have to do it in her place because she'd given her word to stay. And she _had_ to. He was holding up his end of the deal, and what kind of person would Padme be if she did not? And she was needed here. It was her _duty_ to make him see why he had to share this miracle with others.

"There's extra in there. The sickness has taken Naboo, Angel… This will ensure all your family's safety." Vader spoke from low in his throat but did not sound reluctant or unhappy about sharing his creation with others who were not part of their deal. And Padme's jaw fell slack for several moments. He – he was giving her _extra_? But it was well known that anyone he _did_ do business with only ever received one vial – never any more! It was his own selfish way of protecting what he'd discovered and greedily shielding it from the Galaxy… Why do it differently now?

Was it… Was it perhaps that there _was_ hope of dragging his soul to the light once more? A flicker of compassion for the people who, if things had been different, would have been his family? Still, no matter the reasoning, or logic, Padme was grateful. Eternally so.

So the Senator sent off her droid with the vials and a hologram of herself to her family explaining all that had happened… To an extent. All they needed to know, she explained. And what truth she'd rather keep from the world, Padme kept to herself. She sent instructions for her staff to continue on in Coruscant without her, that she would communicate via the holonet for the next month until the looming threat of the disease faded.

Days passed, and Vader was nothing but welcoming to her. Upon Padme's request, a desk had been brought into her chamber equipped with all of the technology she needed to fulfil her duties as a Senator from so far away in the Outer-Rim. _Not_ that there was much that could be done now that the sickness' foul grip had tainted every planet in the Galaxy. People needed the cure, not the Senate. And Padme was going to get it to them. No matter the cost.

She found herself, a week into her stay, wondering the hot, barren hallways of Vader's looming tower from boredom more than anything else. He hadn't been around in days, and there was only so much of Threepio Padme could take without a break. The golden droid followed a few paces behind her, and she wondered if he had orders to do so… Maybe it was to ensure she didn't leave? Or wander too far into the castle… _Or find the cure on her own?_

Her stay here, on Mustafar, was far from ideal. In truth, the lava planet unsettled Padme to her very core… There was something dark that loomed over everything here, the same darkness Padme sensed inside of Vader. Had one inspired the other? Had the allure of seclusion brought Vader to the coldness that marred his eyes or was it the greed of what hoarding the cure could bring to him? She had so many questions, the inquisitive side of her was pounding, but every new question she had, remained answerless, and spawned a hundred others.

"If you have something to ask me, just ask." Came the familiar voice from behind, and Padme's body spun around, heart in her throat. There he was… Just at the end of the hallway, where she'd been a few mere moments earlier, stood Vader himself, face veiled by a cloak as black as night, but she knew it was him. No one else was here… No one but the droids. And above all else, she'd know that voice to her dying day. His prompting was too tempting for the Senator to ignore; the tantalising appeal of answers suddenly overpowered her need to be careful, to please him into listening to her when it came to the cure.

"Why here?" She asked, "Why Mustafar?"

Vader stalked toward her, and Padme's breath caught in her throat as he reached up to push back the thick material, freeing his face from its prison behind the hood. He was still as beautiful as she remembered… His sandy blonde hair had darkened slightly, but grown longer, the slight curls reached his neck now, so different to the short cropped Padawan hairstyle she'd seen him with last. It broadened his face, made him seem… Older. "The Senate made a demand I wasn't willing to meet. They can't reach me here."

"We only wanted you to help people…" Padme whispered, and Vader gave a harsh scoff in response.

"Help them?" He demanded, "What would they have done, Padme? Taken the cure and privatised it, sold it off to the medcenters to sell to the people at astronomical prices? That's _not_ helping people." The _sneer_ in his voice, the hatred of the Republic's ways almost made her gasp. Almost. She could control herself better than that. But her shock quickly gave way to an anger all of her own, Padme had dealt with liars, thieves, people with their own agendas all her life, but there was something not even _she_ could stand for. A hypocrite. And that was exactly what he'd become.

"And what about you? Are _you_ helping people? Do you think letting thousands of beings die all across the Galaxy every single day is _helping people_?" Her voice rose and rose until she was yelling at him just like before. And just like then, Vader stood silently, only watching her, never interrupting to quieten her or defend himself.

Finally, when she stopped, he spoke. "I help those who I deem _worthy_ of help."

"You don't have that power! Padme cried. "No one does!"

"I do now that I took it for myself," Vader smirked, eyes _glowing_ with pride at his so called accomplishments. It only sickened Padme further.

"What happened to compassion? You told me that compassion was the truest form of love… Isn't that still true?" The plea fell from Padme's lips before she could stop it, and when it made it out of her mouth, into the space between them, it lingered there, forcing them both to relive that moment, so long ago when perhaps they'd _both_ been different people. When there'd still been hope for them, when the feelings she'd had for him were a mere whisper, ignorable, debatable… Not utterly consuming and heartbreaking.

And then, when the silence which had extended on and on into a small forever, Vader just turned on his heel and walked passed her, marching into the darkness of the hallway and allowing it to eclipse him entirely. Padme watched him leave, jaw slack and silent because although there were a great many things she would have liked to have said, nothing dared leave her lips. _She'd pushed him too far,_ she thought. But another part of her, the part that was braver, and determined to see her self-appointed mission reach its conclusion knew that she'd just scored a point in whatever game this was. No matter what it night cost her, this small victory was progress.


	3. Revelations

There wasn't much work for Padme in Mustafar in her Senatorial role nor much else. There was only so much of Threepio's conversation a woman could truly take before she became bored and stagnant and Vader could never answer any of her questions. The days and nights on Mustafar rolled up into one constant darkened sky and the view of the blistering lava river beneath the tower although enticing, only furthered the Senator's boredom. She had _nothing_ here. No friends, no family, her staff weren't here and at times, Padme's soul felt entirely and utterly crushed. She was a person who liked to be around people, who thrived on deep and important conversations and laughter and… And _companionship_.

Vader kept out of her way at first, until she'd settled. The only times she saw him were meals filled with an air thickened by unspoken words that neither were willing to be the first to speak. They eat in silence most nights and more than once, Padme found her mind wandering in the quiet. Is this what it would have been like if she'd agreed to marry him? Barely seeing one another and speaking even less… It was just so unlike how it'd been before, on Naboo. Their meals were filled with laughter and stories and his not so subtle attempts at manipulating the Force just to impress her. And now? Now, though his gaze from across the table was searing, they did not speak save for a few formal greetings at the beginning and end of the affair.

That, however, did not last long.

He found while she'd been wondering through the halls, the hem of her gown trailing slightly behind her feet as she admired the empty walls and dark, desolate chambers. She wondered, as he approached, how could someone who'd been so filled with love, and light, have surrounded himself with such bleakness? "Good morning," Padme forced herself to smile as he fell into step beside her. Even his clothing was dark, though hadn't it always been? Anakin hadn't ever conformed to the Jedi's plain cream and brown robes, always selecting tones either black or as close to it as he could find. When she thought back, Padme wondered if these little things, small rebellions against the Order were a sign of what was to come?

"Good morning." He echoed. "I hope you slept well."

"I did. Thank you."

They were quiet for several moments as they walked, but oddly, Padme didn't feel uncomfortable. She suspected he had something he wished to say to her, and her curiosity was, as always since her arrival here, aflame. He took several long moments to muster whatever courage it took to ask what he wanted from her, but Padme was patient by nature and didn't push him… She never had, not even when icy eyes had been warm and blue. But that was so long ago… They were both different people now, him especially.

"I…" He began, and Padme watched him from the corner of her eye. For one, single, flickering moment, Vader reverted and she saw a glimmer of her Ani again. The shy boy who fumbled and stuttered in her presence. It lasted only a moment, but she saw it, and her heart could have leapt with joy. _There was hope for him._ "I need your help."

The admission set the Senator's fiery curiosity ablaze more than anything had since her arrival. That the mighty Vader needed _her_ help? The man who hoarded lifesaving medicine, who turned his back on the Jedi and embraced a darkness Padme could never understand, was appealing to her… What else could she do but agree?

When she did, Vader's face took light in just the same way she remembered as they'd frolicked in the meadow in Naboo and the reminder was intoxicating. Despite everything, she'd _missed_ him all the time they'd been apart and though she knew the monster he'd become, something in Padme sung with a hope she hadn't felt since the sickness first began to spread. A smaller part of herself, one locked away in the deepest recesses of her chest whispered, _since you told him no._ Ignoring it, she let him take her hand and whisk her further into the castle.

Vader led her to a part of the building she'd never found before, one less dark and more metal. Everything was sterile and somehow even emptier than the rest of the building. A large grey door sealed by a rather complicated looking device consisting of a keypad full of symbols she didn't understand kept it sealed, and Vader's gloved fingers danced across it too quickly for Padme to register exactly which buttons he pressed. A moment later, the door tore itself apart, depressurising open to reveal a long, clinically white hallway which seemed to stretch on and on endlessly. The white was intensified by harsh lights hanging above which forced her to squint at to see, but Vader stepped inside without a thought, leading her along too.

"What is this?" She asked as he reached inside a box so white that it blended into the wall, producing a pair of long gloves as black as his own.

"Part of my laboratory," Vader answered, releasing her hand and placing the gloves into her palm. "Put these on."

His laboratory? But Vader _never_ brought anyone in here! He'd had meetings with those attempting to purchase the cure throughout Padme's stay, but they always remained in the same room she herself had found him inside. But he'd brought _her_ … What did it mean? Her quick mind worked overtime attempting to unpuzzle Vader's behaviour, to understand what he needed of her that it meant she had to come inside the place he spent most of his time. She couldn't think of anything.

Vader began to walk along the hallway too quickly for Padme to keep up with, and she fumbled with the gloves – he wouldn't have given her them for nothing – and half-jogged after him. "You've never invited me inside here before." She panted, chest heaving at the strenuous activity. As she caught up with him, she spied his cheeks beginning to pull back with a smirk, the _Skywalker_ smirk she'd once called it… Much to his amusement.

"I wasn't sure if I could trust you… Given your _second_ refusal of marriage." The smile died on his lips but as he looked down at her, Padme saw no malice in his eyes… Nor any warmth. But there was no anger in his words, just acceptance. Padme would take acceptance over anger happily… She didn't know what he was capable of anymore.

"And you trust me now?" Vader paused so suddenly, that she almost continued to walk without him. For a moment, she thought her question upset him, or worse, _angered_ him, but he merely reached out to caress her cheek as he'd done so many times before all those years ago and Padme's eyes fell shut in familiarity.

"Of course. I trust you with my life." He whispered. "And more importantly, with theirs."

Theirs?

Her eyes snapped open just as Vader retracted his hand and reached inside of his clothing to pull out a long, flat card. He stepped around her and slid the card into a black slot built into the wall and a few seconds later a loud series of _beeps_ rang out and a strange _whirling_ sound filled the air. Padme glanced behind her, to identify the source of the noise, but her attention was drawn back when the _wall_ shifted, rising upwards to allow entry into whatever secret room Vader had built behind it.

This is where he kept the cure?

Alas, she was wrong. But the sight which awaited her inside drew a horrified gasp from Padme's lips. Four medical benches hovered in the air in rows of two with various machines beside each one. And four beings lay on one each; tubes of various colours and sizes were plugged into their limbs and fed into the machines. There were others here? More than the droids? But – but who were they? What were they doing here? What was _he_ doing with them? Padme's aghast gaze flicked between Vader and the unconscious beings though he did not meet her eyes.

"They're not alive." He declared, "But they're not necessary dead either. The machines keep them breathing and usually, I have droids tend to their… _Needs_ , but I thought that you might offer something more… Personal." Vader stepped inside the room and toward the benches, but Padme was rooted to the spot. So these people weren't going to wake up? Why? How did he know that? Why were they here? "Something to make things _easier_ for them."

"I – I don't understand…" Padme whispered. "Why are they here?"

At that, Vader gestured with his hand that she should come closer, and she did. He stood before the bed on the right, nearest to the window and when she approached his cold eyes fell upon the sleeping patient. "Her name is Rosekyli. Thirty-five standard years old." The woman resembled a human, but her skin spoke of many differences between their species. Her hair was long and silver and her skin an extremely pale shade of green. Padme had never encountered someone of this race before, despite how well travelled she was… Perhaps the woman was from outside of the Republic?

"She's Argazdan. Her species is extremely similar to ours, especially biologically." Vader explained and moved on to the being by the woman's side. One by one, he introduced the people from various planets and races – two human, three of other species and an equal mix of male and female. "They're all in comas, and meddroids doubt they'll ever wake up. All declared dead… Legally." Padme nodded, but her eyebrows formed a deep frown. None of this explained how they ended up _here_ of all places. If they weren't going to wake up, then why hadn't their families taken them home to bury them or whatever their funeral customs were? Didn't they have any loved ones?

As if sensing her thoughts, Vader glanced back at her from over his shoulder. "They all signed legal documentation turning their bodies over to science upon their deaths. I just… _Acquired_ them before the droids cut off their life support."

"Acquired?" Padme seethed. "These are _people_ , not possessions – I would have thought you more than anyone else would understand that!" That kind of attitude was the very reason he'd suffered with his mother so early on in life – why his mother had to say goodbye… Why he bore long, ugly scars upon his back from Watto's rage. _Anakin_ was compassionate and loved people… Vader, it seemed loved no one and cared for nothing. Her arms crossed on her chest just as his face grew hard and dark.

"I _do_ understand that." He growled. "More than you know." His harsh gaze fell upon the humanoid male he stood beside for a long moment before he spoke again. "But not everyone does. That's why they're here."

" _That's_ why they're here?" Padme drawled, and Vader's blue eyes flicked upwards to meet hers.

"Yes." Was all he said.

"They're here out of the goodness of your heart then?"

"Well, not exactly…" Vader stood tall and rounded the bed to come toward her. "It is these people who we have to thank for the cure, Padme. Without them, I couldn't have researched as thoroughly as I did."

His confession drew the breath from the Senator's lungs. So he _was_ testing on them… And he'd found the cure from it? Suddenly, her limbs grew slack and she wished there was a seat she could fall into… Her family were _alive_ thanks to the sacrifice of these people. The few Vader _had_ cured owed their lives to these people!

"But – you have the cure now. Why not let them pass on?" Surely it was only fair… Wasn't eternal rest the _least_ of what they deserved after the contributions their bodies made to the Galaxy? He should let them go, not keep them trapped within themselves. It was cruel.

Vader gave a long, tired sigh. "I would… But my research isn't done yet. With most diseases, more often than not they mutate and become something else completely. I want to be prepared for that outcome. I need to keep them like this until I can cure different versions of it."

"But why _them_? Surely there are other people just like them who could help?"

"Do you have _any_ idea how many patients I attempted to work with before them? _Hundreds_! These people are the only ones whose bodies reacted positively to the chemicals. Until I find suitable replacements, I need to keep them alive. And that's why I need your help."

Padme almost snorted. "To keep them alive?" She was a _Senator_ , not a doctor. What help could she possibly offer to him with these people?

Vader did not hold back his bark of laughter. "No, Angel… To make them comfortable. Talk to them. Take care of them. A droid's touch is impersonal… Cold. But yours is warm and soft and…" He trailed off, reaching up to stroke the backs of his knuckles along her arm, creating a shiver of goosebumps in his wake. His words reminded her of another conversation so similar to this one, but then her view had been of a glistening river, not lava from the window. And yet still, Padme couldn't help but inch closer as he did, intoxicated by his words and touch. "You could help these people," Vader whispered and his breath warmed her face.

Padme isn't sure who moved first, if it was him, or her or them both, but somehow, for the first time in years, their lips met and it felt like _home._

* * *

Padme spent her time caring for the patients in Vader's medical ward; he gave her the code for the keypad and an access card to allow her entry. The card worked for that room alone and nothing else – she couldn't resist trying. She learnt each of their names, ages and species. She talked to them all individually and as a whole, combing their hair, wiping sweat from their brows and ensuring the tubes that keep their tired bodies nourished were firmly attached where they needed to be. In time, she grew to care for the patients as if they were her own, and Vader taught her how to properly inject their veins with the medicine that kept their hearts pumping in their chests.

The compassion Vader showed these people astounded her. The man he'd become showed mercy to all but none… And yet these people he took care of, he spared no expense on medical equipment and drugs to ensure their comfort. To see such compassion from the man who'd once dubbed it the truest form of love made Padme's heart leap in her chest. There _was_ good in him. She'd been right all along… All she had to do was appeal to the light still within him and make him see the error of his ways. It would not be an easy task, but she was nothing if not a hard worker.

But despite their kiss, Vader did not make himself available to her as she expected him to. Padme saw him just as rarely as she did before, if not _more_ so… That was, until one night when she'd made all her final checks upon the patients and stepped out of the ward to find him there, waiting for her. What surprised her most, was that he was dressed in regular, civilian clothing… Something Padme had seen only once before, when they'd been disguised as refugees fleeing to Naboo…

He'd dawned a simple white shirt that clung to the thick muscle of his arms and a pair of dark trousers… The heavy boots he'd always worn had not been abandoned, however, but the clothing was enough to slacken her jaw. She'd never seen him so… Casual… He looked like any regular civilian, not the once Jedi he was. It was just _difficult_ to think of him as _Vader_ now that he seemed so… So normal. He looked _years_ younger than the opposing figure of Vader – he looked his own age. A young man, not a domineering figure of darkness.

"What's this?" Padme asked, unable to hold back her smile.

"Come with me." Is all he said, holding out a hand in offering and after only a moment, Padme took it. He led her through the castle and toward the large towering elevator chamber – something else which Padme's access card was declined by. She'd never seen the higher levels of the tower before, though, through a little pressure on poor Threepio, she'd learned it was where Vader's private chambers were. After swiping the card, the doors spread apart so the pair could step inside and unlike the elevator in her Coruscant apartment and the Senate building, the walls were not made out of thick transparisteel. It was strange to stand there, by Vader's side trapped within four small walls as the device moved them higher and higher within the mysterious castle. She didn't know what to say… He hadn't answered her earlier question, so there was no use in asking it again. But Padme was _filled_ with questions. What was the kiss? Did it mean anything to him? Where were they going?

What _did_ it mean to him?

What _did_ it mean to her?

It didn't feel like kissing another man. His lips were still soft and warm and slightly unsure against hers, despite everything… It felt like their first kiss by the balcony all over again though the endless heat of Mustafar was a poor substitute for the gentle caress of Naboo's sun. But what did it _mean_? From the corner of her eye, Padme glanced at him. He looked straight ahead, though his hand held hers without hint of release. The contact was… Nice… They'd never really held hands before, surprising as that was.

He said he still wanted to marry her… So that meant he still had feelings for her – still _loved_ her even. He called her _Angel_ , which only proved her point further… Why else would the old little nickname have stuck? But after so many years, how could he still love _her_? She broke his heart and never contacted him again, the excuse being that she did not wish to hurt him any further, but the truth she could only admit to herself years later, was that she'd simply been far too afraid and heartbroken herself to speak to him. Was that selfish? Padme had always thought it cowardly.

But did _she_ still want _him_? How could she? After all he'd done – the pain and terror his own selfishness had caused the Galaxy was incalculable. _Millions_ of beings died because of him, because he was not willing to share. Vader was merciless, Vader was cruel… Vader was not Anakin. Padme loved _Anakin_ … She did. And she'd seen glimmers of him within the shell of Vader, buried deep. And she saw him now, in the playful way he'd dragged her into the elevator with the same youthful joy in his eyes which Anakin faced all things with.

Could she have one without the other? Were Vader and Anakin so entwined that her Ani was truly lost? Or was he hiding behind the mask of Vader to shield himself from more hurt in this life, more trauma? No matter the why, Padme wanted to tear the two personas apart and release Anakin from Vader's grip… _Then_ everything could be alright again. He could _help_ people, not hurt them further. The cure could be free for all without charge. And… And Padme could look into those blue eyes and see _life_ and love again, not darkness and ice.

At last, the doors opened once more, and Vader led Padme through the wide space and into another… Just like everything else, it was empty and utterly desolate and though she should not have been surprised, she _was_. These were the private quarters of Vader? No personal touches, no holoframes holding images… But then, whose faces could he fill such things with? His mother was gone, and how often were slaves photographed? Obi-wan? He'd told her the pair had parted on bad terms and hadn't spoken since… Her? She'd rejected his proposal of marriage and left him heartbroken and alone with no home comfort to think of while fighting in a war.

Were there really so few in this Galaxy who he could call a friend? A loved one? When he did not have his mother, or Padme or Obi-wan, who was left? The heartbreaking answer she suspected, was no one, and it made her heart ache for him bitterly. Anakin had always been someone who deserved _so much better_ than the Galaxy gave him. Was it loneliness that'd driven him to this? Was it rejection? Grief? All of it? She should have done better by him, all of them should…

As Padme's heart broke in her chest on his behalf, she squeezed his hand with her own, glad that their fingers were laced through each other's so tightly. Vader turned with a raised eyebrow and Padme forced herself to smile for his benefit. What was the use in sharing her thoughts? It would only upset him… Anakin hated to be pitied. Vader, she imagined, was worse.

They walked through a large, spacious room bare save for a few desks littered with tools and spare droid parts and Padme's frown deepened further. Surely he had to have _some_ furniture? A bed even? If not, where did he sleep? As it happened, there _was_. Within a chamber near the back, lay a smaller room which seemed almost… Normal. It was small, far too small for someone who'd built themselves a _castle_ to dwell within, but it seemed like a real room – a bedroom. Something tangible. Something a _real_ person would live inside, and for that, she felt rather… Relieved…

A bed large enough for two took most of the space, but attached to the wall was a large screen for watching Holovids and the Holonet shows. By the corner, there was another desk, just like the others littered with spare parts, but there was something else, something which caught her attention more than anything else in the tiny chamber… A lamp. It was not the lamp itself which intrigued her, but the design. It was Nubian. One of her planets famous designer's had made it, Padme would know it anywhere… She'd even considered purchasing a set for herself. But when had he been on Naboo to get one? _Why_ did he get one? Why own a simple lamp when he had such few other possessions?

When Padme opened her mouth to ask him, Vader spoke first. "Your favourite holovid is playing tonight. I thought you might like to watch it…"

She blinked. Her favourite holovid? It as a musical – and a romantic one at that… Really, it was a giant guilty pleasure she'd only confessed to loving to him one night after they'd had a little _too much_ wine… But he remembered it? After all this time, he really remembered it? And he'd made the effort so she could see it? So they could watch it together? It'd been so long since she'd seen _anything_ on the holonet not on the desk he'd given her, much less settled down to watch a _holovid_. Truthfully, Padme can't remember the last time she had _time_ to sit down and enjoy something so simple… And the idea was unapologetically appealing.

"You remembered…" She smiled, and Vader matched it with one of his own. They settled down on opposite sides of the bed, the four pillows split evenly between them to support their backs as the holovid began to play and Padme lost herself in the magical musical spirit of the plot, just for a few hours. Neither spoke as it played, for which, she was endlessly grateful. She hadn't realised just how badly she needed this… An escape from reality and all of the worries that clouded it, an escape from her feelings and doubts they brought, an escape from _everything_ that did not concern the silly romance between the two main characters.

And when it was over, and a ridiculous tabloid gossip show took its place, Padme turned her head to look at Vader. He kept his eyes on the screen, but it was _nice_ to spend time with him like this. They never got to just watch a holovid together, not when he was so worried about his mother, or after her death, or when they rushed off to save Obi-wan and after… There was no time for anything after. Eventually, his eyes too drifted over to her just in time to catch her watching him, and Padme felt her cheeks heat up.

" _Now, let's talk about the juiciest piece of news we have for you today!"_ The female host of the show squealed, but Padme paid her no mind. Though silent, she and Vader didn't need words. His eyes flicked downward, to her lips and she felt her pulse spike. " _The rumour, Jo'seph is that the Queen of singledom herself, Senator Amidala herself didn't leave Coruscant because of the threat of getting sick, but because she's embroiled in a mad passionate love affair with a fellow Senator!"_

Padme shot up immediately with a gasp. Behind her, Vader chuckled but she ignored him. That was preposterous! She would _never_ leave her role for something as ridiculous as a love affair – surely everyone knew that? "How can they say that?" She seethed.

"Those things are trash. Ignore it."

" _No way, Alayna!"_ The male humanoid presenter laughed. " _I would probably believe it if it were anyone but her. I don't know, she's great at what she does, but Senator Amidala doesn't strike me as the mad passionate love affair type."_

" _Well apparently someone's warmed that frozen heart of hers… And her bed!"_ Both hosts spluttered with laughter but Padme felt her cheeks grow hotter with embarrassment and indignation. What business of theirs was it what she did in her personal life! She was no celebrity to be gossiped about – she was a politician who worked to better the lives of the people in the Galaxy! Humiliation stormed through Padme as the bed shifted and she felt Vader move closer.

"Don't let them upset you… They're mindless and talentless." Two large hands, one gloved, the other not, came upon her shoulders but herself Padme tensed further. "Not like you."

"They're right. I should be there, doing my job."

Vader scoffed. "There's no job for you to do there, Angel. Not right now. How long has the Senate been in recess for now? But here, you're helping the patients… You're doing something good." She couldn't argue with that and felt herself relax slightly against the familiar touch.

"I want you to tell me something…" She whispered as his hands left her body. It was long past time she knew what happened to him, what drove him away from the Jedi Order and his friendship with Obi-wan. After everything, Padme deserved to know. He didn't answer, which she took as a silent permission to hear her question. "Why did you leave the Order?"

Silence.

It stretched on and on between them with the only noise in the room being the clucking of the gossip show hosts about some topic or another. Padme couldn't face him, and she suspected he felt much the same from behind her. If this… Whatever it was, was to continue, if she was going to save his soul and make him help people again, she had to know _who_ he was. Was that really too much to ask, to _know_ him? She'd held back for as long as she could, but she couldn't wait another day without asking.

"I…" Vader trailed off almost immediately. "I don't want to talk about that."

No! No, she _needed_ to know! He couldn't just refuse to talk about this… It wasn't fair! Padme had a _right_ to know what happened – from his point of view, not from the various rumours that'd spread around the Galaxy since it happened. "Anakin…" She whispered and the effect was immediate.

" _Don't!"_ He growled, rising from the bed to stand at his full height. "I told you that name –"

"Means nothing to you, I know…" Padme sighed. She met his eyes again and found them wide and angry and perhaps even a little bit afraid. "But it means something _to me._ Doesn't that matter to you?"

"It's not who I am anymore," Vader growled and turned his back on her to look out toward the angry red flow of the lava far below. That wasn't true… She'd seen Anakin in him these past few days – the mask of Vader was just that, a mask! It was a disguise, she was _sure_ of it. The real man was in there, _Anakin_ was in there… She could bring him out – she'd done it already, but now he'd shrunk back into himself again and Padme didn't know what to do.

" _Why?_ " She cried and shifted onto her knees, fisting at the blanket tightly as frustration surged through her.

"You wouldn't understand."

"Then _make_ me understand! Anakin, _please_!"

" _Don't_ call me that!" He whirled around and Padme gasped. Even from where she kneeled on the mattress, specs of a gruesome, sickly, yellow were visible in his eyes. Suddenly, he looked nothing like Anakin and everything like the man, _Vader_ , that he claimed to be. "Anakin was _weak_ and I'm not weak anymore! Anakin let my mother die – he wasn't _good_ enough for the Jedi's precious Order in their eyes…" Rage fuelled his every breath as his nostrils flared wildly. He swallowed thickly, and Padme realised she was holding her breath. "Anakin… He – he wasn't good enough for _you_."

"Stop that!" Padme slid her legs off the bed and rose to her feet, approaching him as though he were not a wild animal whose next move was unknowable. Whose very breath was dangerous. But she knew he wouldn't hurt her. Not Anakin… Not even Vader. "Don't say things like that! Anakin was – you're a _good person_! A hero… And you can be that again if you only –"

"Hero?" He whispered, and it was then she saw the yellow had faded from his eyes as quickly as it'd come. However, it'd been replaced, to her bewilderment, by tears. Immediately, her hands rose up to his shoulders, and after only a moment, she felt his own curling around her waist. " _Hero_ , that's what you think I was?"

"Of course you were! You saved lives every day – what else could you possibly have been?"

"I was a poster boy!" He snarled, and his fingers tightened on her flesh through the dress. "Not a hero! I couldn't – they wouldn't _let_ me do any real good out there."

"What happened?" Padme breathed, heart pounding in the cage of her ribs… The answer to the question so many people had asked was within reaching point and she was _desperate_ to hear it. Anakin lived and breathed to be a Jedi – his every ambition was entwined with the Order when they'd been together. He'd wanted Mastery and a seat on the Council! What possibly could have changed that in his stint as a General? War was a terrible thing to live through, the things someone saw… Padme could only imagine… What'd he seen?

"I…" He choked on his words and looked away from her, so Padme slowly let her hands fall to his chest, running her palms along the soft material of his shirt as she waited, allowing him to gather himself. She couldn't push him, not now… She was too close to the truth to have him push her away. "We were on a mission, and there were kids everywhere – abandoned, orphaned… _Alone._ They were all alone… And there was this little girl – a Twi'lek – her name was Zulara. She was wrapped around my leg or in my arms the whole time we were there and she was completely _obsessed_ with my lightsaber…"

A small, wistful smile took his face, quelling the misery just a little, but Padme didn't return it. How could she, when this story wouldn't have a happy ending? "What happened to her?"

"She was one of the orphans, totally alone in the world… I wanted to bring her back with us – all of them – Coruscant has plenty of rehoming centres for war victims." Yes, she herself had fought numerous times for better funding for such establishments in the Senate. The war victim rehoming centres were the only hope left for some of the children out there, the poor souls who'd lived when their loved ones did not. Countless children had found families through such programs, it was a wonderful thing. "But _Windu,"_ He snarled the name, "He only cared about the mission – nothing else mattered. We were to complete the mission and move onto our next given coordinates without a word. Lingering and – and growing attached, ' _it's not the Jedi way'_." A tear spilled onto his cheek and Padme just barely resisted the urge to reach up to wipe it away. Whatever happened had to have been truly heartbreaking… Where was this little girl now? Part of her didn't wish to know.

"Our mission came to an end and it was time to move out. I wanted to say goodbye." Vader continued hoarsely, "I had some credits, not much, but it would've _helped_ her… But the shelter the kids were in, they said that…" His voice cracked and he tore his gaze away, turning his head to the right and clenching his eyes shut tight. "That because we weren't taking the kids, they had to look into other offers."

"Offers?" She repeated quietly, frowning.

He exhaled once before speaking, whether to regain control or gather his words, Padme wasn't sure. "People _bought_ them, Padme!" Vader snapped, eyes tearing open as a scowl painted his face. "Some people – slaver _scum_ took them!"

"Oh, Ani…" The old nickname slipped from her lips before she could stop it. The horror of what befell those poor children was too much to think about what she called them… The suffering they must have endured – were _still_ enduring and there was no one in the Galaxy to help them. He either didn't hear her or just chose to ignore what she said as there were no barks of the name meaning nothing to him or demands that she stop using it… Only a quiet, heartbroken exhale.

"You _know_ what those people do to little girls – to _Twi'lek_ girls…"

She did. She knew all too well just what suffering that poor little girl was forced into, and no doubt what she knew was only a mere half of it. Padme couldn't begin to imagine the _horrors_ of slavery, but he could. _Anakin_ could. He'd seen first-hand what happened to slaves his whole childhood – and experienced some of it for himself.

"That's why you left? Because of what happened to Zulara?"

"The Jedi don't help people." He spat, and the _hatred_ in his eyes shocked her. "What happened to Zulara and the others was their fault – and the suffering of so many others too. They saved me from slavery only because Qui-Gon forced them to. I couldn't do the same for her. _I couldn't_ …" And he shattered before her, falling into Padme's comforting, desperate embrace as long howls of grief and regret tore out of his mouth and finally after all this time, though there was still far more she needed to know, Padme was beginning to understand just how all of this happened.


	4. Spring

**_A/N: Thank you all so much for your lovely reviews on the last chapter! Sorry for the slight delay on this one. We're about to delve more into Vader's side of things..._**

After Anakin's – not Vader's – admission to her in his chamber, it did not take very long for every old desire to come rushing back to them. Old feelings long suppressed on Padme's part felt new all over again. When they weren't working in their separate offices, and Padme wasn't taking care of the patients, they were always together. Laughing, watching corny holovids like teenagers, playing on the sabacc table she ordered, or the occasional time he'd chase her along the hallway like they were children (it was all his fault really, Padme just ran to get away from him), anything else that filled the time. For what felt like the first time in _forever,_ Padme was having _fun_. And no matter how depressing the castle was, how cold the faces of the droids were, she felt strangely _free_ … And so very adored again.

And with Anakin's adoration came a power, a power she'd never been granted before in any role of her life... Not even as a Queen. She sat by 'Vader's' side as he took his meetings with desperate beings come from all over the Galaxy to find the cure for their loved ones. Almost as if she were his consort. Which might have bothered Padme, if his eyes did not wonder to hers for her judgement in all things. With this power, she ensured the cure was given far more freely than ever before, to those with everything to lose and nothing to give and in knowing that, she slept with a smile upon her face at night.

Though, a smile was not _all_ Padme slept with.

After the fresh touch of love between them, _sex_ quickly followed. The first time they fell into bed together in Mustafar was not the first time they shared a bed… But rather it'd been the first night after he'd been released from the medcenter, fitted with a new cybernetic arm and a heavy dose of painkillers he refused to touch no matter how she pleaded. No matter their time apart, they'd only been with each other, and Padme thought there was something rather _special_ about that.

And between them, despite the oppressive heat and gloomy darkness of the lava planet, spring was born.

Everything felt new again, the kisses, the touches, the gentle gestures that spoke of their feelings without words… Nothing was the same as it had been between them before. They were different people than they'd once been, and it gave them the chance to fall in love with each other all over again. Padme fell easier and harder than she had before without the shame of the secrecy that surrounded them before. It just felt… _Easier_ to love him now… As silly as that was.

Eventually, the mark of the month she was supposed to stay came and went, but neither spoke a word of it. Padme was sure they both were just pretending they hadn't noticed. And while drafting messages to her staff detailing the extension of her break, she smiled knowing this was one pretence she was _happy_ to play.

Perhaps the biggest change between them was that Padme didn't call him Vader, not once after their first night together. The false name didn't sit well in her mouth, and although he was still reluctant to allow her to speak his true name, little by little, his resolve crumbled and it wasn't very long before – when the situation called for it – he was very, _very_ happy to hear the name " _Anakin_ " tumbling from her lips. That did not mean that he'd fully dropped Vader, in name or behaviour. He was still colder than before, still cruel when it came to sharing the cure despite her best efforts in some cases, and Padme came to see that to have him willingly free it for universal use, it would take much more work on her part than she'd originally anticipated.

Still, Padme let herself be cornered all across the castle whenever the mood struck him, and laughed as he dragged her into the nearest closet or chamber – some of which did not even include _beds_ – though the only company they had were unsuspecting droids. It was _nice_ after so many years of worry, of duty, of burying herself in her work, to love and laugh and to do it openly, without the need of secrecy or lies. After all, Anakin wasn't a Jedi anymore. He'd walked away from the Order willingly and from what he'd told her, there was no shame in it. Who cared if people knew they were together now? The only problem was Vader.

Vader was not the man Padme loved. He was a cold, cruel shell of a man – a mask her Ani hid behind to veil his identity from the Galaxy. The masquerade was the only obstacle in their way, the only thing stopping them from living together _happily,_ just like they'd both wanted before the war. But was Anakin ready to discard his persona? Did he even _want_ to? Padme couldn't stay on Mustafar with him forever… There was work she needed to do back in Coruscant. She missed her family, Sola and Darred had long since been released from the medcenter and were well again! She wanted to go home and see them. To hold her beloved sister in her arms and see with her own eyes that she was safe. But, Padme didn't want to go alone. She wanted Anakin to come with her – _Anakin_ – not Vader. Vader couldn't come near her family, she wouldn't _let_ him.

Padme was twenty-eight standard years old now, four years older than her sister was when she'd had her second child. She wanted to have a family of her own while she still was young enough to balance both her work and them and be able to keep up with it all. And she'd spent so long pining for Anakin when they were apart, loving him from afar, worrying about him while he'd fought in the war, that she'd never expressed a romantic interest in another man, never dated anyone else… Never loved anyone else. There was only one man Padme wanted to share her life with, but she feared that despite his love for her, Anakin may not be strong enough to resist the call of Vader.

As she lay on her stomach in what had quickly become _their_ bed in his room, clothed only in the thinnest shimmersilk nightgown to survive the heat that endured into the night, Padme watched her love sleep by her side pensively. His gentle snores were muffled by the pillows he'd buried his face within, and his mouth hung open in the most childishly endearing way… If it were any other night, any other time, she might have smiled and run her fingers through his hair affectionately. But not tonight. Tonight her thoughts were far from affectionate. The blankets came only to his waist, leaving the torn, scarred flesh of his back exposed to the Senator's sad eyes. There were several newer scars scattered across his skin… Some that resembled burns of some kind… Just like the kind Padme's father had on his fingers from receiving a harsh shock while attempting to rewire a lamp. Were they from the fighting? Was he burned somehow, or shocked? Or was it something else? There was still so much he hadn't told her, but she'd been afraid to push him about it… Why did he come to _Mustafar_ of all places? Was it really just to hide from the Senate? _How_ did he have this castle built? How did he find the cure without medical training? Padme couldn't stop the questions from circling her mind over and over again, and the more she thought them, the less anything made any sense.

Jedi had _nothing_. No possessions, no credits, no homes… _Nothing._ They had only their lightsabers and the robes on their backs. Anakin had told her that himself. So how did he live after leaving the Order? He had to have stayed somewhere, and earned his keep somehow. Who did he turn to? The sickness hadn't begun then, there were no desperate souls he could manipulate into offering their live savings for a chance at survival. How did he live? She rolled onto her back, turning away from him with a frustrated huff. He clearly had no intentions of telling her any of this on his own or else he would have done it by now… How could she make him open up to her again? Padme _loved_ him and she wanted to share her life with him, but how could she when she barely knew anything about him anymore?

* * *

Vader glanced over his shoulder as he dressed, and smiled fondly at the Angel still asleep. Between them, it was Padme who usually woke early, forcing _him_ out of bed, but he would not begrudge her some extra sleep this morning. It suited him that she slept late. The longer she did, the less likely it was for her to go wandering through the castle and find something she should not. With a slight waver of concentration and a little manipulation of the Force, Vader's dark cloak gently lifted from the chair he'd discarded it onto – something ordered through the holonet by Padme – and into his hand.

Quietly as he could, he slipped out of the chamber and threw the cloak onto his body as he walked. There was much that needed to be done today… He needed to speak with his Master this morning as arranged. Any delay would risk great fury on his part. Fury, Vader did not desire to be turned onto him or else he jeopardised his solitude here.

As he walked, quickening his pace slightly, he was greeted by Threepio as he trotted along the hall. "Master Anakin! I do hope you had a pleasant rest."

He was running late. And yet, something nostalgic within him could always find a little time for the old droid. "I did. Thank you, Threepio. Now, where are you off to in such a hurry?"

As usual, the droid seemed to positively _light up_ when talk of his duties arose, and Vader made note to find something more for him to do around here. "Oh, yes! I was just on my way to wake Mistress Padme! She asked that I –"

"No!" Vader barked before he could stop himself, startling the droid backwards a step or two. "Let her sleep this morning."

If he could have frowned, Threepio would have, and Vader felt himself begin to grow impatient. _He needed to get to the holocom…_ If he was not there when the signal came through… It was not something he liked to think about. But first, he had to make sure Padme was left alone. Not for the first time, the former Jedi wished mind tricks worked on droids without frying their circuits. He valued Threepio, and wouldn't enjoy doing such a thing. Not to mention the extra work of piecing him back together… "But Mistress Padme explicitly asked that I –"

Vader exhaled, frustrated. " _I'm_ explicitly telling you, _not_ to wake her. Understood?"

At once, Threepio straightened at the harshness of his tone, though clearly saddened at the loss of something to do and Vader's anger immediately fell flat. He reached out to touch the cold shoulder of his old friend and forced a smile for his sake. "After an hour or so, if she's not awake, then wake her, alright? You can even prepare a late breakfast for us. Let her know I'll meet her then."

"Oh yes!" Threepio practically cheered and the prideful enthusiasm returned to his cybernetic limbs at once. "I shall see to it immediately!"

"Alright." Vader nodded and forced another smile before stepping around the droid again to continue on his way. "Oh, and Threepio?" He called back after the droid suddenly as he padded along the long hallway. "I'm _not to be disturbed._ " Threepio understood immediately and gave as close to a nod as he could perform with a bolted neck and both parties took their leave of one another.

Once Vader reached the doorway he needed, high in the second tower, just three short steps from the elevator shaft and typed in the correct passcode, making sure to swipe the secret key card he kept hidden deep in the pocket of cloak, the door pulled itself upwards, slipping into the thick slot carved out of the strong durasteel framing to contain it. The moment his boots stepped inside the vast chamber, the door fell heavily once more with an echoing slam, and a series of long clicks signified the locks turning themselves back into their holding position.

In the centre of the room, was a large rounded device built into the very building itself. A holocom. Top of the line and heavily modified to ensure the signal was scattered enough to never be traced. A strong blue hue leaked from decretive screens which were fitted a few inches apart all the way around the holocom, illuminating the blackness that engulfed everything and as Vader stepped closer, he reached back to tug the loose hood of his cloak over his head and gave a long sigh. _And so it begun again._ Within moments, a shrill alarm sounded, drawing another sigh from the man as he fell to one knee and bowed his head.

The holocom immediately answered the incoming signal and within seconds, the hologram of the elder man beamed out before Vader, larger than he knew him to be in life. " _Lord Vader…"_

"Master." Vader bowed lower, closer to the floor and then looked up, from beneath his hood. And there stood the Supreme Chancellor of the Republic, the true leader of the Separatists and Lord of the Sith, Sheev Palpatine, or as Vader had come to know him these past years, _Darth Sidious_. The man who'd taken him in after leaving the Jedi Order, after their hypocrisy became clear and he needed some truth. Sidious had shown Vader the realities the Jedi kept hidden, and helped him to unlock his true potential while they'd only held him back. They were Master and Apprentice. The two in the rule of two. Brothers. Kin. That was what he said, and yet Vader had come to feel more like the Sith's errand boy than a partner. Careful to shield his mind from his Master, Vader kept his face impassive, emotionless. "Everything is going as we expected."

"Good…" The old man drawled, voice crackling. His face, as usual, was hidden beneath a black hood of his own, and that was all Vader had seen of him in quite some time… In these conversations at least. He saw plenty of the Chancellor Palpatine over the holonet. "Though I have heard some disturbing whispers of late, my apprentice."

"Whispers?" Vader's mind immediately thought of Padme, and he struggled not to bear his teeth toward the blue shadow before him. No, it couldn't be about her… He'd have heard from the old man far sooner if he knew Padme was here. Vader would have been summoned back to Coruscant for a punishing… Still, his heart sped up in his chest and the cool touch of fear dipped into his veins. _Sidious would use her against him._ He'd threaten her – subtly, but enough that Vader had no option but to obey if he valued her life. No! Sidious couldn't know about Padme. Not until he was ready.

"There is someone claiming to have discovered the secret to our medicine," Sidious growled, and Vader's body shuddered with relief for a moment. He didn't know… She was safe. But when that one, blissful moment of relief passed, his Master's words sunk into his mind. If others knew how to replicate the cure, then all their work would have been for nothing… What he'd done would have been for _nothing_. "I thought I said only _one_ dose per those I approved."

Vader almost rolled his eyes. He'd followed the old man's rules to the letter… Except with the Naberrie's. But how could he have refused those who would soon be his own family? But what Sidious did not think of, was the flaws in his plans. What other than fear, was to stop someone from simply using what he gave? "I have done what you asked, my Master. The doctors who originally created the cure are dead, and anyone who receives it is well warned about sharing. No one can know the truth."

Sidious cackled from deep in his throat. "Yes… Watching you slaughter the doctors _was_ a pleasure, Lord Vader. But we must be sure word of our work does not reach the public's ears. I have sent the fool claiming to have the cure to you under the guise of working in the Republic's secret laboratories. See to it that he does not return."

Vader's breath caught tightly in his throat. How was he ever going to hide this from Padme? There were _no_ other beings here. She would notice the arrival of someone else… And she would ask questions whose answers would drive her away from him again. _No_! _He would not lose her again_. He was finally strong enough, powerful enough to have her; he wasn't going to let her go. Something had to be done… And quickly. But what? _What_? He racked his brain, and nothing of use came to him. Panic began to build as his Master watched over him.

"I sense a great distress within you, Lord Vader…" Sidious' cold yellow eyes peered down at him, narrowing suspiciously, and Vader tried not to shudder in revulsion. _Calm. He needed to be calm. Keep your composure. Shield you mind._ It took a great effort, but somehow the fallen Jedi managed to smile a smile full of spite for the other man who would no doubt mistake it for one of pleasure at what he was going to do.

"It's nothing Master. I'm only planning how best to rid ourselves of this problem."

* * *

When his talk with Sidious was completed and the holocom shut itself down once more, Vader remained kneeling for several moments in the darkness. How long did he have before this so called _doctor_ arrived? Hours? A day or two at the most… There wasn't a lot of time to prepare. Once he was here, that was the easy part. Vader could kill the man without blinking. Violence had become his second nature, death was his weapon of choice and he dealt it without mercy or hesitation. His power was fuelled by rage, by _fury_. It was his age old guardian, his mentor, the protector who'd shielded him from harm. That fury could be easily turned onto a doctor. Especially one who threatened his plans.

But if she saw him here, then everything would come out. Padme would _never_ let it go and there were only so many lies he could make her believe. He was _so_ close to having it all, power, wealth, _her_ … Vader could taste it. He only had to wait a little longer before two became one and he could take over Sidious' plans with Padme by his side. But if she learned of what happened – what _truly_ happened, she would leave him again. She would _hate_ him. And worse, she would tell the Senate, and Sidious would lash out. Her precious life hung in the balance and Vader didn't know what to do.

His hands curled into tight fists as he threw himself back onto his feet again with a growl. There was only one way around this. Padme had to leave him, leave Mustafar for a while… But even that was a risk. Once she was gone, returned to her home and her friends, she might not return to him. She might _tell_ people where she'd really been in order to dispel the rumours about a lover. Vader knew what she wanted from him, to give away the cure as if it were his to give, but he couldn't. Because it wasn't. Sidious would have them _both_ killed if he did. The cure was Palpatine's path to the Galaxy – to the Empire he had planned. And it was Vader's too. For that reason, he couldn't give her what she wanted. It wouldn't be long before she questioned him on it. Demanded that he give into the goodness within him and save people. _If only she knew…_

Within a few months, Palpatine would heroically _acquire_ the cure and if a system wanted it, they'd bend the knee. It would be used to create an _Empire._ One Vader stood to inherit if all went to plan. And if it did, he would have his Nubian Empress to rule by his side– _then_ he could give her what she wanted. She could have her every desire. They would make things how they wanted them to be. But he had to keep the truth shrouded just a little longer… To do that, Vader had to trust her. Trust that she _did_ love him as she said, that she _would_ return to him. And when she did, the doctor would be dealt with and his Master would be pleased enough that Vader would report their relationship to him for once and for all. And then, once Padme was his wife, and everyone knew he was hers and she was his, he could tell her everything, and make her understand.

And after… After Vader disposed of Palpatine, and the Jedi and everyone else who posed a threat to his power, then the Skywalkers would rule the Galaxy.

 ** _Please review!_**


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